THE DANA FAMILY’S 2009 YEAR IN REVIEW

You know you are the Parent of a Young Child when...

1. You have ever used a baby monitor as a walkie-talkie. “Dude! We are out of diapers/wipes/patience up here. Come quick!”
2. Seeing a movie in the theater and taking long, hot showers are rare luxuries.
3. You play rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock over changing the next soiled diaper.
4. You rarely wear clothing that cannot be easily wiped clean of bodily fluids.
5. A diaper bag is your new little black dress or “man purse,” as the case may be.
6. The consistency, frequency and odor of poop are frequent topics of casual conversation.
7. You plan your days around another person’s sleep schedule.
8. Your living room resembles a day care center in the aftermath of a cyclone.
9. You develop hair pulling and pinch deflecting moves that rival the best mixed martial artists.
10. Your spouse calls you at work to inform you that your child now knows what sound a cow makes. You consider drafting a press release.
11. You marvel at the versatility of the baby wipe. Perhaps it can cure cancer?
12. You have strong opinions about diaper pails.
13. You have ever hastily ripped out the batteries to a repetitive children’s toy while quietly muttering obscenities to yourself.
    
14. You have had to be peeled off the ceiling after being startled by a toy’s sudden, unexpected sound or movement in the middle of the night.
15. You know all of the words to [fill in the blank] children’s CD, as it is the only thing that magically captivates your child during long car trips.
    
    

Developmentally Speaking

You probably expect me to regale you with cute anecdotes about how precocious and above average our 16-month-old daughter, Kate, is. But I won’t. Kate is fairly average thus far. She rolled over at 5 months, crawled at 8 months, pulled herself to standing soon later and took her first steps at 11 months. At 16 months, she mostly babbles but says enough words to satisfy her pediatrician and uses sign language to say even more. So what if she sticks her index finger in her mouth when we ask her where her nose is? It’s perfectly normal that she likes to stick a bucket on her head and wander around the house bumping into things and giggling about it, right? She frequently walks on tip toes and admires the view between her legs in the downward dog yoga pose. I swear I did not teach her to make farting noises with her mouth pressed against the leather couch backs, either. And doesn’t every 15-month-old devour a chunk of raw, ginger and soy-infused tofu, miso soup and a whole bowl of pickled ginger while her parents have sushi?

Kate also has awesome taste in literature—“I Love you Stinky Face,” “The Very Hungry Caterpillar,” and “Hands, Hands, Fingers, Thumb” are certainly tops. But she also appreciates other perennial classics like “Goodnight, Moon,” and “Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What do you See?” Gloria and I started a 2-person book club. Unfortunately, unlike Kate, we have yet to finish a single book.

Recently, Kate has even cultivated a quiet reverence for “The Muppet Show” when she rarely pays TV much attention, otherwise. And my smart brother chose a Sit and Spin as a Christmas present for her this year. It is not the Sit and Spin of ‘80s yore, though. This thing plays a mixture of upbeat popular music and techno, so she can practice what it feels like to attend a rave. She even giggles and staggers drunkenly after playing with it for a while and now enjoys spinning around while standing in place, until she falls down. Her favorite CD is definitely Ziggy Marley’s children’s reggae music, “Family Time.” That thing is like toddler crack! One moment tears and whining, the next moment smiles and squeals and then car seat sleep.

Soon after being introduced to solid foods, we opened the stinky pureed meat food jar, and smart girl hated it. To those of you who have no experience, it resembled something worse than SPAM salad or cat food. While still not a major fan of beef, she now enjoys pork, lamb and seafood of all kinds, especially if loads of garlic, ginger or tomato sauce is involved.

Around Easter, she began crawling and almost immediately cruising throughout the living room. At her Great-Grandma Rosalie’s, she did repeated laps around the coffee table to cheers.

Road Trip!

In March, we took a pilgrimage to Virginia Beach and DC to visit Kate’s Gram and Uncle Bill. On the way, we took a detour to see Chris’s alma mater—James Madison University in Harrisonburg, VA. While there, we stayed with the gorgeous and extremely hospitable Showalter family. Unfortunately, Kate redecorated their couch with her vomit. Poor Chris soon followed suit.

Interests and Inactivities

In June, we realized that Kate was a bit too young for the Frederick Meijer Children’s Gardens . But we enjoyed the flowers, sculptures and strollercise, regardless.

We celebrated the 4^th of July in Mason with my Mom and Stepdad, watching the parade of large farm equipment and the Ingham County fireworks from our backyard. Unfortunately, despite our countermeasures, this also resulted in a particularly rousing attack of the merciless mosquitoes.

In July, we got to spend some time with old friends and their families--the Bells and the Aggarwals, who were in town visiting their families. Kate also experienced her first boating trip on Pine Lake courtesy of our neighbors, the Langones. “Go! Go! Go!” she seemed to instruct the Captain Jay, excitedly.

Meanwhile, Chris was consumed with constructing our self-proclaimed backyard “deck of ill repute” with the generous help of neighbors and friends. My brother, Trey, also came to stay with us to take care of Kate while Chris labored during the week. Kate adored spending time with her uncle and took her first steps during his visit.

A Man in Uniform

While enjoying ice cream at Turtle Tom's in downtown Mason, Kate spotted a uniformed Mason Police Officer standing in line for some ice cream. She promptly made eye contact with him and began beckoning him toward her with her index finger. He slowly saddled up alongside her to greet her and gave her a police badge sticker. She was beyond thrilled, and we never saw her do that to anyone before or since. What can we say? She likes men in uniform.

Kate Graduates to Toddlerhood; Cats Stage Boycott

In August, we commemorated Kate’s first birthday with a Winnie the Pooh themed party and BBQ lunch at our house with family and neighbors. We stripped her down to her diaper and placed her own personal chocolate cake on her high chair tray for her to devour with her hands. My Aunt commented that this should be a birthday tradition well into our adult years. I agree. On her actual birthday, Kate got shots and not the fun kind.

As Kate gained increased mobility and independence, both of our cats developed UTIs and an aversion to peeing in the litter box, once treated. After a weekend ER visit, our older fat cat was diagnosed with diabetes and now receives 2 insulin shots per day from Chris. My one and only attempt at sticking her resulted in malpractice as evidenced by the yowling. Our younger cat is apparently depressed and/or anxious, since Kate learned to walk and more easily chase and torment him. He began marking when he never did before. So, now our smallest furry family member is on anti-depressants. He is not yet seeing a therapist. Too bad cats cannot qualify for Medicare or benefit from health care reform.

Furlough Fridays Fun

The summer and fall were consumed with state budget woes. Since I am a state government employee, we experienced another suspenseful night on September 30^th, wondering if we would have another state government shutdown based on the legislature’s inability to reach a compromise on balancing the budget by the constitutional deadline. During the summer, because of the deficit, we took 6 involuntary unpaid furlough days. At least they resulted in long weekends, sometimes around paid holidays. We took advantage of those days to visit the Ablers over Labor Day weekend in Manitowoc, WI. This year was special, because we got to watch Kate interact with their two boys, one of whom is only 1 month older than Kate. However, I am thankful to have a job at all.

This year, Chris honed his photography skills by shooting weddings throughout the summer and fall, including one he shot by himself in Lansing. He is excited to continue doing so in the coming year.

For my birthday, we managed to exploit Detroit’s first annual restaurant week to have a hugely discounted meal at Opus One in downtown Detroit. Unfortunately, around the same time, I somehow managed to injure my pelvic joint during a yogalates class at the Y. Happy Birthday to me. I am still not quite right. But you all already knew that.

The Great Pumpkin, Kate Monster

In October, Kate’s Gram visited for a week while we prepared for Halloween and attended Chris’s first Mason Orchestral Society concert of the season at MSU. Gram also taught Kate the ever amusing "happy face/angry face" routine which provides hours of entertainment for adults and toddler alike. They constructed a large wooden painted witch for our front porch that slightly disturbed and/or impressed our neighbors with its size and intricacy. Kate took her first trip to Uncle John’s Cider Mill and helped pick out our big pumpkin. Unfortunately, once it became a Jack ‘o Lantern, it transformed into a scary monster that eats cute toddlers. Later that month, we saw Robin Williams: Weapons of Self Destruction live at the MSU Auditorium and relished the brief child-free excursion.

Kate was an actual “Kate Monster” for Halloween. She was very scary in her puffy pink outfit complete with horns and large feet. After watching her valiant efforts at unwrapping some of the candy she received from trick or treating, we opened a few miniature chocolate bars and gave her a sample. She could not stop with the “Mmmmmm-ing!” And she cried between bites, because we could not get them to her lips fast enough for her liking. She now does this in response to me demonstrating how much I like a particularly healthy fruit or vegetable I want her to try.

Kate’s Great-Grandma Jo survived 2 major surgeries to remove colon cancer and correct the incision site this year. She is now recovering and living with my Dad and Stepmom in northern Michigan. We wish her continued healing and an improved quality of life.

Kate’s Uncle Bill dropped in for a visit during a working tour of US cities in November. In no time, Kate was reaching up to him and climbing all over him in glee.

Spirit of Christmas

Later in November, I took a squirmy screaming Kate to the Mason Orchestral Society’s Christmas concert to watch her Dada play and the Lansing Civic Players act out a few skits. We think she may have to stay home for future concerts, until she gets a bit older, but it got me in the Christmas spirit, and she made a few older ladies giggle.

Over Thanksgiving, we traveled up north to celebrate an early Christmas with my Dad’s family. Being the only tot in the family, she received a ridiculous amount of toys and clothes. In fact, she had to take a nap while we continued opening her presents without her.

Like a true dieting martyr, I began a new campaign to lose 35 pounds within the next 9 months or so just before Thanksgiving. After a brief hiatus, I am back on track and have lost 11 pounds so far just by restricting calories and keeping an on-line food journal. This should be a bit easier now that Chris stopped the continuous baking of Armenian shortbread cookies and key lime cheese cakelets!

Annual Wins and Losses

This year, we lost Michael Jackson and Edward Kennedy among many other notables. Obama increased the number of troops in Afghanistan but set a goal for withdrawal in 2011 AND won the Nobel Peace Prize. We followed the train wrecks that were the Gosselin family and Octomom. Perhaps having extreme multiples is an indication of other ailments. Boo on Carrie Prejean with her fake boobs, beauty queen crown and support of Proposition 8. And I must snicker a bit at SC Governor Mark Sanford’s “hike” along the Appalachian Trail of lies. He may have met his “soul mate” in Argentina, but he also lost his mind and political career. At least his wife, the apparent brains behind his political success, landed a Vogue interview and a book deal out of it. And she didn’t go all Tiger Woods’s wife on his ass, either.

And how can we forget poor, vomiting balloon boy, Falcon Heene. First of all, who names their son Falcon? At least his parents were sentenced to non-consecutive jail terms, so they can keep better track of all of their children in the future.

Also in 2009, “Wise Latina” Sonia Sotomayor became a new U.S. Supreme Court Justice. We worried about H1N1 and stalked public health departments for our share. “Birthers” questioned President Obama’s origin, and we questioned their ability to read. We watched the U.S. Legislature debate and ultimately pass a version of healthcare reform and the Michigan Legislature hem and haw over state budget cuts. Cash for Clunkers was a smashing success. My, what a large Stimulus Package you have there!

Groovy Train

Kate’s Gram and uncles Bill and Matthew visited us over Christmas. Much to our surprise and delight, Uncle Bill presented Chris and our whole family with an elaborate Lionel Train set modeled after the Polar Express to start our own family tradition. This reduced Chris to tears, as he thought of his late Father and his childhood love of train sets. Kate loves to make it whistle and will even control the train herself and then squeal and run away to Mama. We are proud of our budding conductor.

Well, we hope you enjoyed our little year-end review, despite its lack of colonoscopy, childbirth and kidney stone references. Off we go to crash a Presidential Ball or two.

Kate is 15 months old.

Kate enjoyed crunching, running and falling in the soft fall leaves outside of her Great-Grandma Rosalie's house. Sadly, Kate has very few leaves of her own to jump in.






Kate was a "Kate Monster" for Halloween this year. She attended a Working Mom's Play Group Halloween party in E. Lansing earlier in the day and then went to a few of her friends' houses trick-or-treating before helping Dada pass out candy. Unfortunately, it was rather cold and windy that evening, so she had to come inside early. When she did, she promptly dumped out her candy and tried to open the wrappers. She loudly exclaimed "mmmmmm!" when we gave her a few bites of a plain milk chocolate Hershey's bar. She also cried between bites.

Her Gram visited in early October and helped us pick out a pumpkin at Uncle John's Cider Mill and pumpkin patch. Kate did not so much enjoy the bonus Elvis impersonator, though. Gram also helped C paint a gigantic wooden witch for our front porch to go along with the birds, black cat, spider web and other various and sundry Halloween decorations.

Kate turned 15 months old on 11/19. She measured 32 inches tall (90th percentile) and 25 lbs., 4 ozs (83rd percentile.) Thank goodness we were able to get her both doses of the seasonal and H1N1 flu vaccine, as well.

We all visited Papa Tom, Granny and family over Thanksgiving to celebrate Christmas with the extended family. Kate had a great time playing with her aunts, uncles and cousins but was exhausted from all the excitement. She received so many thoughtful gifts, including The Wizard of Oz, clothes, gold glitter high tops, a pink snowsuit, footed PJs, boots and board books. It was also nice for her to spend time with her Great-Grandma Jo, who is recovering from a second abdominal surgery following the removal of colon cancer over a year ago.

Kate is walking and running, saying a few words ("Hi," "Yeah" or "da," "'nana," "s'that?" "mama" and "dada." She also signs "milk," "hungry," "all done" and "more." Her favorite things to do include flipping through board books, having them read to her one right after another and playing "I'm gonna get you!"

Helicopter Parenting.

This article by Nancy Gibbs of Time Magazine discusses the new fangled concept of "slow parenting," where you allow your child free play time and do not constantly hover over their every activity and learning opportunity. C and I have discussed this numerous times. Parents who overschedule and constantly push their children may be doing them a disservice. The freedom to actually be bored births some of the most creative boredom busters and sparks independent thought. While I can relate to and understand the inclination toward helicopter parenting, I am glad to see a cultural shift in the works.

Whether born out of necessity or on purpose, I often had time to do nothing as the child of a single parent. Although I was not athletically talented or predisposed, I spent hours riding bikes through our neighborhood with my best friend, watching the dreaded TV and writing and tape or video recording our own newscasts, choreographed dance routines and plays in her parents' basement. We even kept journals, wrote poetry, sang and played instruments. We did not attend a regular dance, music or gymnastics class outside of public school, and Gymboree did not exist. However, we were able to explore our own interests, cultivate creativity and test the boundaries of our independence. As teenagers, Chris volunteered caring for autistic infants, and I helped clean up a local river. He also played the violin, began learning German and cultivated his other, varied interests, and I acted, sang and hosted a high school radio show.

Kids may also benefit from being allowed to fail, get hurt and fight their own battles. Not once did my Mom intervene on my behalf to argue a grade with a teacher. And I would have been absolutely mortified if my Mom ever argued with my college professor or attempted to negotiate my starting salary with an employer! If I felt strongly enough about it, I knew that it was my job to do so, or I could simply work harder to prove myself the next time. While I agree with the author that immunizations, car seats, seatbelts and bike helmets are rational methods of reducing risk to children, I also agree that trying to shield them from every possible harm, no matter how remote or improbable, is irrational.

These are interesting revelations for me, because, by all accounts, my Mom was an overprotective and nervous Nelly as a parent. She was one of the first moms in the 1970s to insist on the use of a child car seat and fought with her parents and in-laws about it. When I was a baby and toddler, she was afraid of letting me fall and get hurt, or that I would catch a cold from an inquisitive stranger at the grocery store. She constantly read books and talked to me as an infant and toddler, exposed me to boy-centric toys, taught me "Free to Be You and Me" and told me I was smart and beautiful all the time. And she was terrified when I learned to drive and rode in cars with teenagers. But, she must have eventually let go or learned to live with the fear. I hope we can, too.

Creating a Happy Family Life.

This article entited "The 5 Secrets of Happy Families," by Barbara Rowley, in Parenting magazine offers some insightful tips:

1. Express gratitude to yourself and those around you even if you have to fake it.

2. Try to be satisfied with your choices instead of constantly trying to maximize or second-guess them. Do not compare yourself to others. Limiting your options and those of your family helps.

3. Focus yourself and family members on moments of joy in your past, present and future.

4. Spread out special experiences and treats like toys, clothing and vacations to create contrast, anticipation and appreciation.

5. Nurture your inner circle of friends and family, because your relationships, not your money or success, bring you happiness and satisfaction.

Chivalry is not Chauvinistic or Dead.

I read this article from The Frisky web site on CNN's web site about why men should buy flowers for their romantic partner. But it could apply to any thoughtful gesture between a couple. Not to brag, but my husband is really good at this. I could be better.

The point the author was trying to make is that buying your partner flowers, their favorite dessert/junk food or a trinket that they swooned over in a catalog or while shopping recently demonstrates that you were thinking about them when they weren't there. You were not thinking about your anger or how much they irritate you but of how you could make them happy. How purely loving and romantic, especially if you are not merely 'a courting each other.

Kate is One Year Old!

Kate turned one year old on Wed., August 19, 2009. We celebrated her birthday the previous Saturday afternoon with a party at our house. She seemed to enjoy every part of it after she got used to having so many family and neighbors in one place. She adored tearing into her own birthday cake and into all of her many gifts. Unfortunately, she got poked with 3 more immunizations on her actual birthday. She is now 30.5 inches tall and 24 pounds--both exactly in the 89th percentile. She also has many more teeth growing in, including some molars.

Since getting a bunch of push and pull toys, her walking skills have improved. She practices all the time and can now walk across the living room without assistance. She is so proud of herself.

She is weaned from her bottle and from formula and now drinks whole milk out of a sippy cup in addition to nearly everything that we eat. She only uses her pacifier at nap and bedtime now, too. She constantly babbles in a conversational tone and enjoys flirting with people who catch her fancy in the grocery store or a restaurant.

11 Months and Walking!

Kate turned 11 months old on Sunday and visited her great aunts, cousins, Great-Grandma Rosalie and Grandparents. We decided to put her in one of my old dresses and bonnets. I thought this was a great effect, even though the dress is still a bit big on her. Bonnets are the shiznit!

Kate also took her first major steps towards walking full time last night--5 steps in a row towards Dada to be exact. Because her Uncle Trey is staying with us, he got to witness this important event first hand. The photo to the left depicts the actual steps.

Last week while all 3 of us enjoyed some ice cream at the shop downtown, Kate spotted a local police officer in full uniform standing in line for ice cream. Admiring his impressive ensemble, she quickly made eye contact with him and proceeded to beckon him towards her using her index finger. He slowly saddled up alongside her and gave her a police badge sticker. She was thrilled, and we were amazed at her behavior. This was the first time we saw her do that.

Lately, besides the walking thing and gaining 4 additional top front teeth, she thrives on gaining the attention of strangers and everyone in a given room by laughing loudly and hysterically or engaging in other similar hijinx. I dare anyone not to smile in response to such enthusiasm. She is such a happy girl.

10 months old!

Here is our big girl this past weekend. She visited her Grandma CeCe, Grandpa Joe and Great-Grandma Rosalie on Saturday while Dada shot a wedding. She is cruising all over the house on the furniture with her curious hands and mouth on everything. Needless to say, gates are in effect, and the cats are learning to run when she squeals near them. She is feeding herself finger foods and even liking meat now that it is not pureed. Cheese, yogurt and Cheerios are among her favorites.

On Dada's first Father's Day, she helped him open his gifts and presented him with this poem:

Thank you, Dada
for cleaning my poo
like you so often do,
for playing me Dvorak, Beethoven and ZZ Top—
they rock!

Thank you, Dada
for taking me out to play
or just finger painting on a rainy day,
for tossing me up in the air
and blowing raspberries to show you care.

Thank you, Dada
for carrying me on your shoulders so high
that I nearly touch the sky,
for knowing just how to clip my nails
and tickle my toes.

But not everybody knows
that you hold me when I cannot sleep
and soothe my tears when I weep.
You bathe, burp and feed,
adeptly caring for my every need.

You teach me--
to talk,
to walk,
to laugh,
to gently love animals (whether Roxy, Kanu or a baby calf),
to eat healthy foods,
to not be rude,
to trust and let go,
and to watch a garden grow.
And so I wanted to say thank you, Dada,
for showing me the way
on this your first Father’s Day.

Medical Decisions for your Children.

The case of Minnesota 13-year-old Daniel Hauser and his parents recently thrust the issue of religious/parental rights vs. a government's right to intervene and prevent child medical neglect in the national spotlight. This article summarizes other, similar cases and their outcomes throughout the years, making it abundently clear that the issue is far from black and white. I found it especially interesting in the article above that one set of parents would get their family dog vaccinated regularly due to legal mandates but would opt out of vaccinating their children and seeking medical treatment based upon their religious convictions.

In my opinion, there needs to be a multi-pronged approach to this medical, ethical and legal question. If the child is mature enough to understand the treatment options, risks and benefits, then the court should defer to the child's preferences as expressed through his own legal representative. However, if the child is too young, uneducated or immature to make this decision for himself, his own legal representative should, together with medical professionals and child welfare officials, collaborate to develop the appropriate treatment plan, regardless of the parents' religious beliefs. To me, doing otherwise is child neglect and endangerment.

Of course, my opinion is colored by the fact that I do not belong to a religion that eschews traditional medical treatment. But I agree that a line needs to be drawn between parental rights and state rights where medical treatment and other issues are concerned. There is a potential slippery slope if the line hovers too far toward state rights. For example, should the state intervene to require vegan parents to feed their children foods it deems more appropriate to sustain their growing bodies? Should the state be allowed to forbid a parent from homeschooling their child or treating a non-life threatening illness with homeopathic or alternative medicine rather than traditional drugs? There are already state mandates regarding child car seat use, school attendance and some vaccinations are required before children can attend daycare or public school.

What concerned me most about the Hauser case was that, although he was 13, Daniel was homeschooled, illiterate and could not even identify the word "the" when tested by a teacher for entrance into a charter school. In addition, doctors testified that chemotherapy had an over 90% success rate in curing his type of Hodgkins lymphoma. In fact, the cancer was responsive to the one treatment he previously had and grew larger once treatment stopped. I think the judge in this case did an excellent job of weighing the issues and crafting a reasonable resolution that did not separate a scared child in extreme pain from his concerned, but perhaps misguided, parents during his next set of chemotherapy treatments.

9 months old.

Kate turned 9 months old yesterday. Here she is on the swings at Patriarche Park in East Lansing last Sunday. Today, she had her 9 month well-baby visit and continues to thrive. Her iron and hemoglobin levels were excellent, and she did not have to receive any vaccinations this time. She is 22 lbs, 4 ozs (93rd percentile) and 29 inches long (91st percentile) up from 19 lbs, 11 ozs and 27 1/4 inches 3 months ago.

She is cruising on the furniture and standing alone for a few seconds at a time. Walking cannot be all that far behind. We are working on waving and feeding herself bite-sized foods. The girl loves her oat puffs and Yo Baby yogurt, fruits, veggies and some table foods but still looks at meats with derision. And, much to our chagrin, she does not understand the concept of "no!"

She loves to be sung and read to, be hung upside down, to dance with Mama or Dada and to play on the swing or slide at the playground. C takes her to an infant play group and to storytime at the public library once per week. We cannot believe it is already time to plan her first birthday party!

First Mother's Day

Grandma and Kate Mama & Kate

C bought me a dozen orange roses and three cards for Mother's Day--one from Kate (with her finger painted autograph), one from the cats and one from C. We then had brunch at my Grandma's with my Mom, Stepdad, aunts, uncle and cousins. What a perfect first Mother's Day!

Happy Anniversary to us!

Happy 2nd Wedding Anniversary to us! What a year together it has been. C surprised me at work today with pink daisies and lavender tulips, and we went to lunch together as a family. We will not get to see much of each other tonight, as C has orchestra rehearsal. Fortunately, we already had our fancy night out 2 weeks ago at a steakhouse at the MGM Grand, Detroit while my Grandma Rosalie and Aunt Elaine babysat Kate.

I love you, Sweetheart! I remain grateful that you chose me.

8 months old!

Our little girl is 8 months old. Last week, she began crawling forward and gaining more independence. So far, she is a vegetarian, as she gags on the pureed meats. Based on the way they smell, I would, too. However, she loves rice cereal or oatmeal mixed with pureed fruits.

She constantly scans the room with her curious eyes and enjoys being in new places with new people. When comfortable, she displays her budding linguistic skills with all sorts of babbles, laughs, grunts and squeals. She circulated happily at Easter dinner in her poofy, pretty party dress.

Yesterday, we went to a Lamb Festival on a local farm, and she observed the scene seriously and quietly not sure what to make of all the "maaaaas." Soon after her tour of the barn, she fell fast asleep in her stroller.

She uses her hands in a raking manner and adeptly picks up her pacifier and places it back in her mouth when it falls out. She is also loving "Peek-a-Boo," the "Itsy Bitsy Spider," and "Pat-a-Cake" in addition to nearly any other song. She laughs with joy when sung "You are my Sunshine" and is starting to enjoy storytime more and more--especially rhyming books like Dr. Seuss or Mother Goose.

We visited her Gram and Uncle Bill in Virginia and DC in late March. Unfortunately, she had her first stomach virus her first few nights there while staying at a friend's house. Fortunately, they have a 3-year-old daughter, a scotch-guarded couch and some Pedialyte. A few days later, C also got violently ill for one day, followed by Gram and me with less symptoms. Kate had a blast playing with 3-year-old Ivy who could not stop hugging and kissing her (photos on C's camera.) She also enjoyed all of the one-on-one time with her Gram who played with and sang to her tons.

She is starting to say "Dada" and "Mama" more frequently and sometimes with apparent meaning--sometimes not (C claims that she called the cat, her toys and most other objects "Mama.") We cannot wait to see what her 9th month will bring....

Seven Months Old.

C did a great job with this photo yesterday. I have been a bit recalcitrant in posting monthly updates and have 5 month professional family portraits still waiting to be posted.

Kate is 7 months old today. At her 6.5 month check-up, she was 19 lbs, 11 ozs (94th percentile) and 27 1/4" long (88th percentile). She started cutting her first tooth (bottom front) last week, which explained her recent night owl activities.

She is attending a bi-weekly play group in Lansing with her Daddy and other stay at home parents we met on the Lansing Moms Like Me site. We also signed up for a weekly swimming lesson at the local YMCA, but she has not been enjoying it (possibly due to the cooler water temperature than expected.) We left after 5 minutes last week during "Simon Says" in complete meltdown mode.

She is not yet crawling but pivoting and rolling around the room rapidly like a chubby bowling pin. She also pulls herself to a standing position with assistance and is able to briefly stand on her own while holding onto furniture. The nurses guessed that she would be walking by 9 months.

She now takes her baths in the big tub surrounded by toys and has eaten carrots (loves), green beans, squash, sweet potatoes, peaches, applesauce (loves), and prunes (loves--great!) She is not a fan of sweet peas.

In comparing her growth and activities to my own (thanks, Mom, for maintaining a baby calendar), we grew at about the same pace, but I was startled to see that the pediatrician back then had my Mom starting me on solids at 1 month old! I did not respond well, so that was delayed for a few more months, thankfully.

Gettin' Lucky.

This article from The O Magazine really got me thinking about re-training your mind to unravel your own happiness. I am certainly no expert on cognitive psychology, but I have had life experiences to back up its recommendations. There really do seem to be folks in our lives who seem inordinately burdened with misfortune or blessed with good luck. Most of it appears out of their control, but is it?

It sounds cliche, but the saying "your attitude affects your altitude" could not be more true. Folding your arms across your chest, avoiding eye contact and standing in the corner during a social event does not attract interesting conversation or new friendship. Something as simple as a friendly smile and eye contact can make all the difference. Being a joiner and keeping an open and aware mind also helps increase the chances of positive interactions with others.

I recall admiring extroverted people in my life who invite others into their circle everywhere they go. At the extreme end of the spectrum are people like my Aunt Linda who strike up conversations with bank tellers, grocery store cashiers and passengers on planes, even though they will likely never meet again. Most people decline to make the social investment in such situations when the investment could actually reap unimagined dividends. The more people you know, the more opportunities for happiness and connection (professionally and personally) you create. See--Facebook, LinkedIn and its ilk really do have a positive purpose!

I also took to heart my Dad's advice that you can learn something from everyone--from the uneducated farm hand to the Harvard-educated Wall Street maverick. Everyone has a story to tell and a lesson to teach, which is perhaps best personified by the StoryCorps oral history project. Featured on National Public Radio (NPR) broadcasts, since 2003, it has recorded conversations between two people who are important to each other connecting and talking about things that matter. Sometimes it is a Grandson interviewing his Grandfather about an important or life changing event or an older couple reminiscing about their years together. This called to mind my audiotaped interview with my Papa about his experiences during WWII and the recordings my Aunt Elaine made of my Great-Grandmother about her experiences as a child during the Armenian Genocide, which occurred contemporaneously with WWI.

My good friend, Nobuko, also gave me a book (newest version here) that compiled written essays from the This I Believe national media project. It is based on a popular 1950s radio series hosted by Edward R. Murrow. The essays, read by the author, are often broadcast on NPR and share personal philosophies and core values of writers from all walks of life. One of my personal goals is to some day write something worthy of this project. Would you?

Child Safety Seats

C and I have been navigating the complicated market for convertible child car seats, since Kate is nearing her infant car seat's height limit, and we want to keep her in the safer rear facing position beyond the 20 lbs and 12 months old recommendations. Note: At 6 months old, Kate, my petite flower, is already 20 lbs. She is also tall with long legs that are reaching the end of her infant seat.

Like my search for the best initial car seat, there is a dizzying array of options on the market catering to different heights, weights, uses and budgets. So far, I mentioned Baby Bargains as a good resource for buying all things baby. I also stumbled upon this resource from the American Academy of Pediatricians. Thank goodness for charts with height and weight comparisons as well as some guidelines for when a child can transition to a forward facing seat, a booster seat with harnesses, a booster seat without harnesses and finally just a seat belt in the back seat.

So far, I think we are buying the Graco ComfortSport (up to 40" and 40 lbs for about $80 at Target), unless we decide to spring for a model that will last beyond 3-4 years, like the First Years True Fit Convertible Car Seat (up to 50" and 65 lbs for about $180) or the Evenflo Symphony Convertible Car Seat (all-in-one rear & forward facing plus converts to a booster seat up to 100 lbs for about $200.) We are trying to avoid the ultra expensive but well reviewed Britax models that cost $300+. Hmmm....how big will you be at 3 years old, Kate?

Most states now have a child safety seat and booster seat law that requires all children to be restrained until they reach a certain height or weight and/or age. In Michigan, all children must remain in a safety seat until they are 4'9" and 8 years old, effective July 1, 2008. See MCL 257.710e.

Childhood Vaccinations.

This is such a hot button topic on nearly every internet-based parenting board or magazine. Some parents are adamently against vaccinating their children for any disease, others selectively vaccinate their children (usually omitting or delaying the MMR vaccine) and still others strictly follow their pediatrician's advice and the CDC Immunization Schedules.

I will disclose that we fall squarely within camp #3 after researching the research on this issue. Also, my husband is a scientist. All of the reliable medical evidence is on our side in addition to a recent court ruling that there is no link between mercury-laden vaccines and the MMR vaccine and autism in children. Reporter Campbell Brown from CNN recently summarized our sentiments on the research and court ruling here.

I want to emphasize one of Brown's points and my largest concern. The more people either refuse to vaccinate or delay vaccinating their children, the more once arrested communicable diseases will experience resurgences and spread among our population. Keep in mind that immunizing your child is not the only intended consequence of the vaccination program; immunizing everyone protects your child before she receives each vaccination from encountering someone who could transmit that disease to her. The more non-immunized living amongst us, the more risk to everyone's infants and toddlers of diseases once fatal or permanently debilitating to those populations. In addition, sometimes the vaccination dose given is insufficient to prompt a strong enough immune response from a particular child. Instead, we must rely upon other successful immunizations to help protect her from exposure to the disease. Anecdotally, my dentist told me that her one-year-old, despite adherence to the immunization schedule, contracted the Rotavirus from a daycare setting.

In addition, the Times of London recently conducted an investigative report concluding that the scientist who published the study linking the MMR vaccine to autism was found to have improperly altered his data to derive the result he desired. This offends principled scientists and researchers who spend much of their time painstakingly testing hypotheses in a manner that can be replicated.

So, we immunize our children not just to protect them but also to protect others from potentially life threatening diseases. And the science behind Dr. Wakefield's 1998 paper should not be trusted. I choose to rely upon the mountain of scientific evidence that contradicts his findings instead. I can only hope that other parents' decisions not to immunize do not adversely impact my child or other children. What do you think?

Rock 'n Roll!

Kate is 5 months old. About a week ago, she began rolling over. She did it so quickly that we missed it the first time. Then she surprised us by not only rolling front to back but also back to front. Tonight, I discovered her rolled from her back to her stomach with her head propped up in her crib. However, she was distraught at being unable to roll back over due to being pressed up against the (breathable) crib bumper. Silly girl.

Out with the Old.

I copied this from Wishokie's site after reading her insightful responses. Feel free to post your own answers, either in the comments or on your own blog! Here are mine:

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
Gave birth/became a mother; underwent surgery (C-section); tried to breastfeed; bought a minivan; filled a stocking.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't generally make resolutions, but I always have long term goals like move more, eat less, save more, clean more and call more. I am still trying.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Me on 8/19/08, Becky & Steve (Benjamin), Sejal & Jeff (Shayla), Jennifer & Marc (Alex), Stephanie & Andy (Gretchen), Heather & Jim (Holly), Onya & Clay (Tyler) plus one of Chris's work friends and some on line friends. It is a baby boom in our circles with more on the way.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My maternal Grandfather died on 12/30/08.

5. What countries did you visit?
Too busy being pregnant and wrangling a newborn to travel.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
A finished basement and a clean and well-organized house. I know, I know....dream on.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
8/19/08 when Kate was born and 12/30/08 when Papa died.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Kate!

9. What was your biggest failure?
Letting my weight creep back up and our messy, disorganized house.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
UTIs, high blood pressure & nausea during pregnancy. Preeclampsia that necessitated the administration of magnesium sulfate, and eventually, a C-section where they also removed noncancerous ovarian cysts. Also, 3.5 months after delivery, I developed an unexplained case of hives all over my body for 2 days that went away with antihistamines. This overlapped with a sore throat from hell that turned out to be nothing.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Our minivan--so much easier. Also--our snowblower. Also so much easier.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Chris's. He is a fun, talented and affectionate Daddy to Kate, and he was a huge help to my family when my Papa was in his last days.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Madoff using a Ponzi scheme to rob people (I also learned what a Ponzi scheme is), IL corrupt politics, the Caylee Anthony homicide and similar crimes and, more generally, others who do not have enough love and respect for themselves to care for their children properly.

14. Where did most of your money go?
House/Baby/food/car purchase

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Obama's election & Kate's smile and giggle

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
The K-k-k aty song that Papa sang to Kate when he met her.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? About the same.
b) thinner or fatter? Slightly fatter, I think. I was only 1 month pregnant then.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Taken more time off work before delivery. Slept & exercised more.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Eaten, fretted, nagged.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
It was Kate's first Christmas, so we decorated our house and filled stockings. We had dinner at my Aunt Julie's on Christmas Eve. On Christmas Day, we got up early, opened our stockings and our presents from Chris's Mom and Brother and from each other. Then we had a large breakfast at my Grandma's with the extended family, opened Kate's many presents and ours, visited Papa in the nursing home where we sang Christmas carols and fed him ice cream and came home to a wonderful Christmas dinner cooked by Chris. The days afterward we spent at my Dad's house opening more gifts for Kate and us and playing "Dancing with the Stars" on the Wii.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
More and more deeply every day with Kate and with Chris.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
We rarely missed watching "Dancing with the Stars," "Grey's Anatomy," "Desperate Housewives" and "Brothers & Sisters." We also bid a fond farewell to "Boston Legal."

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No.

24. What was the best book you read?
It was either The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy, Baby Bargains or What to Expect When you're Expecting. Super exciting stuff! I started to read a Pulitzer Prize-winning novel--really I did. I just did not get very far.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? Adele

26. What did you want and get?
A point and shoot digital camera, a Blue-ray HD DVD player, make-up & Chris home with Kate

27. What did you want and not get?
We cannot find a damn Wii console anywhere for its retail price. Nintendo, we want to give you our money. Please take it! Chris has taken to stalking Walmart, Sam's Club, Target and Toys'r Us. Watch out!

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
"The Dark Knight" for Heather Ledger's performance. We did not see many films this year, but we are catching up by using Blockbuster online.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Our neighbor Julie, and her daughter, Megan, babysat Kate while I enjoyed a delicious dinner at All Seasons Bistro in East Lansing with Chris. I was 33.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not sure.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Anything that actually fits. Thank you, Target, TJ Maxx sales racks and Motherhood Maternity.

32. What kept you sane?
The routine of work, enough sleep, Chris, my family and writing about it.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I kind of have a crush on Jon Stewart and his show.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
Worry about the long term impact of a bankrupt Big 3 automaker.

35. Who did you miss?
My Papa. Also, my best friend, Shantala, who lives far away.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
Kate. We are still getting to know each other.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
There is no one right way to do parenthood. Also, those tabs on the sides of aluminum foil and plastic wrap are there to hold the roll in place.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I've got you under my skin/I've got you deep in the heart of me/so deep in my heart that you're really a part of me.

Sooooo Big!

Kate had her 4 month well-baby visit today. She is actually 4.5 months old, so the percentiles may be a bit misleading. She measured 25 3/4 inches long (85th percentile and up from 23 inches at two months) and 16 pounds (82nd percentile and up from 11 lbs, 5 oz. at two months). Perhaps most dramatically, her head circumference increased from 38.5 inches (45th percentile) to 42.5 inches (78th percentile) in two months. Girl, you have a big head!

Lately, she has been enjoying rattling off a constant string of gutteral "Mmmmm...mmmmm....mmmmm" sounds. She has mastered all of her 4 month skills except for rolling over, although she gets an "A" for effort. She is giggling more loudly when Daddy blows raspberries on her neck and cheeks and tickles her all over. And, although the nurse practitioner today could find no evidence of cutting teeth, we think the teething process has begun. The drool is fairly constant, and she often has her whole fist shoved into her mouth with occasional fussiness. She is also sleeping more during the day while maintaining her typical 8-10 hour nighttime siesta, as well.